Celebrating

Milestones. The sign that one has accomplished something. It feels good to look back, and to be able to see how far you've come, what obstacles you've conquered, the way you've grown and changed.

This particular milestone, is my 10 year wedding anniversary. Ten years of laughter and joy, ten years in which we've watched each other become parents and learn immensely about ourselves, our life and our relationship.

I wondered for a long time what an appropriate gift would be. It's not an easy choice. I wanted something we'd both enjoy, and also something memorable. I scoured Etsy for ideas, and then I found this amazing little shop. 

The immensely talented Sabina makes these custom cartoon-style portraits. The likeness she was able to achieve is uncanny.

The gift was a hit, and I may just make this a recurring tradition. 

Design Mom Feature

Do you have go-to blogs? Blogs you always refer to when you have a question, blogs that you check in on daily?

I have a few, one of my favorites being “Design Mom”. Gabrielle manages to cover so many topics I am interested in, like parenting, decorating and travel.  Her stories of living in France were amazing.  She also has these fantastic columns about “Living with kids” and “Birth Stories”, stories that you can get lost in, and almost always relate to.

I only quickly mentioned it on the blog, but my daughter was a preemie. She was born 12 weeks early, and spent 2 months in the NICU. It was a very difficult time for us. Not something that I openly shared or felt able to discuss at the time. But a year and a half later, after reading one of the birth stories shared by another reader on the Design Mom blog, I felt ready to write about it. So I started writing, and it felt good, cathartic to write it all out. At first, I simply wrote it all out because I thought it would help me heal from this trauma, because that is what this experience was, but once I finished, I thought that by sharing it, my story may help someone else going through something similar, give them hope, or maybe even help them heal. So I sent it to Gabrielle, and  to my surprise, she found it interesting enough to publish on her blog.

I am of course honoured, and thrilled, and a little terrified…..

If you guys are curious, hop on over to her blog to read about Sienna’s story.

New life

When I last updated this blog I had promised myself that I would not let too much time pass before updating it again. Alas, I have broken my promise again. As much as I wanted to keep it, life, once again, got in the way.

Let's recap. The holidays were busy, but great, our biggest challenge this year being the weather. The bitter cold started much earlier this year, so we were unable to do some of our traditional outings. The Christmas market is no fun at -20 degrees or closer, neither is a walk around town to admire Christmas decorations. We will make up for it next year. This lack of outings and dreary weather have also resulted in very few photos being taken.  Thank you polar vortex!

I certainly have some serious catching up to do.

And just as I thought that I'd get a fresh start in 2014, my baby daughter decided to make her appearance 3 months early! I spent my days by her side, at first struggling to keep positive, then cautiously optimistic as she started improving. We worked hard to keep a routine going, mostly for my son, but also for ourselves, to help us keep our sanity.

It has been an emotional roller-coaster, having felt panic, paralyzing worry, guilt, helplessness, but also euphoria and happiness. 

Through it all, one thing has helped me cope, and that is the wonderfully calming effect of my knitting needles. Well, ok, to be honest also the occasional glass of wine and massive amounts of chocolate.

She has now been home for 2 weeks and a new stage has begun. A new routine, getting to know each other and lots of cuddling. 

For today I wanted to share a glimpse of my precious baby girl. 

Soon, I will share some finished FO's.

An Identity Crisis?

Warning! This is a long Blog post, so make a cuppa before you delve into this story.

Something significant happened this month. I have reached a momentous milestone in my life.

As some of you may know I was born and raised in Romania, and I moved to Canada as a teenager. It sometimes feels like it was a lifetime ago, and just as often is feels like it was yesterday. This month has marked the half-way point. I have now lived in Canada just as long as I have lived in Romania, and as of now, the balance tips the other way!

I have a hard time wrapping my mind around that fact. And it has made me think. Am I no longer truly Romanian? Does one’s background fade if one is away for too long? Am I officially Canadian now? What makes one Canadian?

The truth is that even on my first visit back to Romania, which was only 2 years after I had left, I was told that I was different, that it was obvious that I no longer lived there. I cannot tell you how that statement hurt my feelings at the time. But at the same time I was happy, because that meant that I was adapting to my life abroad pretty well. At that age, all I wanted was to fit in, and I was desperately looking for that feeling of belonging. Over the years I have realized that fitting in is not the be all and end all. It is nice to be set apart by something, to be unique, but try telling that to my 18-year old self!

Canada is my home now, I met my husband here, I had my son here, we have built out home here, but does that mean I am a true Canadian? I decided to build a sort of a checklist to evaluate things.

What does it mean to be Canadian?

A love of Hockey?

I have to say that I get swept up in the hockey craze every year, it is after all the same principle as soccer, but on skates, with sticks and a lot more padding. I may not watch the games religiously, but we make it a family activity, and my son is obsessed with the sport, therefore, I give it a check in the box.

A love of Maple Syrup?

My uncle is a beekeeper in his spare time, so I grew up eating it with everything. But I kept an open mind, and these days, on my shelf, next to the never absent jar of honey now sits a can of maple syrup, and I like it just as much. So we have another check in the box.

A love of the outdoors?

I am a city girl. I grew up in Bucharest, we lived pretty centrally, and I love the hustle and bustle of the city. I am one of those people that do not mind having the sounds of cars honking and trams rattling by in the background. Living in Canada I have learned to appreciate the fresh air, the quiet, being able to sit on the balcony in the evening and hearing the loons fly by overhead. I have started looking for hiking trails, and love going away to a cottage on weekends. I may not have completely embraced the outdoors, but I think I am on the right track.  So another check!

In no way do I mean to say that the 3 above-named criteria are the only defining traits of Canadians. There are a lot of different aspects to being Canadian, one of the most important, to me at least, is an inquiring, open mind, a thirst for adventure, and a love of your surroundings.  

And what I have realized, is that while I am becoming more Canadian, I am still also embracing my own past and heritage more then ever before, and they are not mutually exclusive. 

So here's to another 18 years!

Friendship

How do you recognize a good friend? 
How do you know, that a friend is also your soul-mate? 

Is it the fact that they are the first ones that come to mind when you need someone to call? Is it the fact that you are comfortable telling them absolutely anything? Or is it the knowledge that even though great distances divide you, and a long time may pass between phone calls, once you do see each other or talk, it is as if you've never skipped a beat?

I am fortunate enough to have a handful of friends like that. And I was also lucky enough to be able to catch up with one of them this weekend. We had not met face to face in almost 4 years. We are both mothers now, but neither one of us had met the other's kids. And even though we have both gone through such a life-changing event, we have in a way moved in sync. It's almost as if we understand each other even more then before.

She is the friend that inspires, speaks to, and probably understands my creative side the best, as she herself is an incredibly creative person. She is a handbag designer and overall multi-talent. But I digress.

When I found out that she was visiting, I decided to make something for her adorable little daughter.

I decided on the Paulette pattern by Nadia Crétin-Léchenne. This is the first one of her patterns that I am trying and it was perfect for her. I chose to knit it in Tosh Merino Light and all I can say is WOW. This yarn is to die for! If you want to check out my pattern notes, you can find them on Ravelry.

It is a short visit, and I cannot bear to think about how long it will take until we we are able see each other next. 

I can only take solace in the fact that our bond is as strong as it is, and even though we were not meant to be close physically, we are soul-mates and always close in spirit.

There are those who hate knitting

My love affair with yarn and knitting has been going strong for about 4 years now. When it first began, I did not talk about my passion much, I suppose I was a bit embarrassed and I felt that I had to explain or defend my love of knitting. But as time has progressed, I have become more and more comfortable and confident, and while it’s not something I immediately reveal about myself, I am extremely proud to be a knitter. Also, my friends have been encouraging and supportive and this has nothing to do with the fact that I have occasionally bribed them with knits.

I was thrilled when, recently, one of my friends expressed an interest in learning how to knit. We decided on a date, and I went over armed with yarn and knitting needles. While our kids ran screaming through the house, and our husbands were absorbed in a baseball game, we made ourselves comfortable on the couch and set to work.

It went really well. My friend is a natural! By the end of the night she had knitted a few rows and was feeling confident that she could continue on her own.  I left happy, knowing that I had recruited another knitter.

Alas, my success did not last! Later that evening I received dire news, my friend’s knitting progress had come to a screeching halt. It seems that knitting enemies lurk everywhere! She sent me this photo

While she was upstairs, putting the kids to bed, their dog, obviously feeling threatened by the appearance of knitting needles and yarn, signifying yet another reason why he won’t be getting the attention he so desperately craves, decided to put an end to this initiative and chewed up her knitting needles.

He did however leave the knitting intact, which to me simply means that if nothing else, this dog at least has some respect towards the effort it takes and the work that was done!

So knitters beware, there are enemies hiding in plain sight…

Five

Five years. My little boy is five years old today.

I always get a little sentimental when it comes to his birthday, because I know how lucky I am.

Lucky to experience motherhood, when some of my friends have trouble conceiving.  

Lucky to have a healthy, happy child when there are parents that have to endure the heartbreak of caring for a terminally ill child.

Lucky to be able to come home and hug my son, and I have been hugging him a little tighter since Friday's events in Connecticut.

So, today I feel grateful for our good fortune, for living a normal, uneventful life.

Every year on his birthday I've written a letter to Aidan. Sometimes I write about the highlights of teh past year, sometimes I write about my experience being his parent, or about my own childhood. I hope that these will be a fun and interesting read for him when he will reach adulthood.

Do you have any birthday rituals? For your kids or yourself? How do you feel about your kids getting older?

Compassion

A few weeks ago, something my son did, gave me pause. His cousin had hurt herself, and was crying, but he was completely unimpressed, concerned with continuing the game he was playing.

It made me wonder. Is compassion something you are born with? Is it something that can be taught? To be honest I was bothered by the fact that he did not go up to her to check if she was all right, to try and comfort her.  

In speaking to my friends that also have kids the same age, I was given examples of children reacting the same way, but also of children that are very concerned with the well-being of others. I probably over-analyzed the situation, but I could not let it go.

So my husband and I spoke about this subject at length, and decided that even tough some people may be more sensitive to the needs of others, this sort of attitude is certainly something that can be taught. But how to approach this subject with a 5-year old child?

The perfect opportunity presented itself to us, when my husband was approached by a work-colleague who is a spokesperson for "Samaritan's Purse". It is a wonderful organization with multiple initiatives. One of which focuses on providing kids all around the world with some joy around the holidays.

We chose to fill 2 boxes  one for a boy, and another for a girl. We explained to Aidan that not all kids are as fortunate as he is, that oftentimes parents are unable to give their children everything they need, no matter how hard they try.

Then, this weekend we went shopping and involved him in the choices, and I was glad to see that he was into it, asking questions and maybe even pondering this newly learned information.
I have always talked about how important family traditions are to me, and I think we have found a new one. We plan on packing these boxes each year, to make Aidan a part of the process and make sure that he learns to be loving, considerate and compassionate.

How about you? Any such traditions in your family? Have you ever had your child react in a way that has made you wonder about values and how to teach them? I would be curious to know!